muscle shirts and mini skirts

first things first...the link to my Mud Fest Pictures wasn't working and no one told me!!! so don't I feel like an idiot. anyway, I fixed it up good and you can all enjoy them.

Ah summertime! In Korea it means almost constant rain with insanity-inducing humidity and occasional pockets of sunshine that are so searing that you'd think you were a vampire. I'm not joking. I honestly thought Southern Ontario was a pretty humid place in the summer...even when it's not raining here there are literally tiny water droplets hanging in the air for you to walk through and still get wet. it's riDONCulous!! Anyhoo, along with the weather comes some summertime favourites of fashion, namely the muscle shirt (on guys) and the mini skirt (for the ladies...oh my, how wonderful the world would be of those two were reversed!!). Now, for those of you who may not know, the muscle shirt is basically a t-shirt with no sleeves, cut thus in order to showcase one's bulging byceps (or lackthereof). It's a sure a sure indication of a chotch. A distant cousin of the muscle shirt is, of course, the wife beater.

I don't know about the muscle shirt, but the mini skirt is definitely a new arrival in Korea, thanks to Western culture and fashion. America is improving the world!! *ahem, that was sarcasm, just in case you didn't catch it. sarcasm in print can be tricky, you know* In a country where sleeveless shirts on women are still considered slightly scandalous, there are quite a few mini and, dare I say, micro mini skirts walking around out there. I try not to judge, but I can't help it when I see a girl walking around in a cute little skirt that keeps flying up in the high winds that often accompany the rain this time of year. It's akin to the feeling I got when I saw girls trudging through the slush and snow in flimsy ugg boots at Western. What feeling, you ask? Well, a mixture of disappointment in the overall common sense of my gender and smug superiority. I'm a horrible person...

On the same topic, there is also something here that one rarely (if ever) sees in Canada..."couple style". That's right, anywhere you go you are sure to see at least one young Korean couple wearing matching shirts. I'm not talking about coordinating colours, I'm talking the exact same shirt. Quite often it's pink, too. When I first saw this phenomenon I felt certain that the male was being cajoled into to doing this by the girl, but alas I'm left to surmise that maybe, just maybe, the guy was the one who picked out the shirts...

I went to the new E-Mart in Gwangju today to do some browsing and get the heck outta my apartment and during my travels I picked up two of the greatest examples of konglish fashion. (Konglish is the interesting combo of Korean and English.) My foreign friends and I love seeing the absurd things that are written on signs and shirts. Often it's funny because it's just grammatically incorrect and makes no sense, but there are other times, GEMS if you will, where the English is correct, but the message is so hilarious and or out of place that it instantly becomes awesome. I came across two such cases today. The first shirt, the discovery of which I can't take credit for, has the following message on it:

There's no doubt! I will always be your only friend (and you'd better stand by me for this particular reason)

(What?!?! It's so awesome! who doesn't want a shirt that says this)
The second shirt says, and I quote:

GETTIN' LUCKY in my box

no jokes! (if you don't understand why it's funny, click HERE)that's what it says. and there was a whole stack of these shirts available for poor unsuspecting Korean girls to pick up and wear. Naturally I bought both shirts and plan to wear them with pride during my trip to Canada.

I can't leave out the rare case where someone will be wearing the most kick-ass English shirt in the most unlikely of places. I was on the bus (aren't I always) driving through a tiny town (isn't it always tiny?) and I saw a Korean wearing a bright yellow shirt with a red maple leaf. Naturally the maple leaf caught my eye and upon closer look, I noticed that his shirt said "Fucking Freezing" on it. Too bad the bus was moving, otherwise I would've gotten off to shake the guys hand and/or steal his shirt.
------------------------------------------
While I was shopping I decided to try on a pair of shorts, just for shits and giggles. The sales lady comes and asks my waist size (ahahahaha! I almost typed "waste size"! wouldn't that be hilariously gross?!?). While I don't know dimensions, I do know that in Korea I am consistently "largee" size. She pulls off a pair with an 88 on it and states "very largee size". I look at it and chuckle because I just tried that pair on and it didn't fit me. "Very largee" indeed.
------------------------------------------
Speaking of fat, I went out for dinner with my school teachers again and it was really good. Until the prinicpal called me over for our obligatory awkward silence/conversation and he decided to call me fat again. This was all in Korean, but I do believe he was comparing his paunch to mine. awesome. i feel pretty. (mom, don't email shane about it...it's not that big a deal :D)
-----------------------------------------
I don't know if these have infiltrated the toddler market in Canada yet, but some genius decided it was a good idea to create a toddler shoe with a squeaky toy in it. I guess it's kinda like the bell on your cat. If the annoying squeaking stops, you should be worried as your toddler probably just fell down the stairs. wow, i really AM a horrible person! I shouldn't write these at night before bed...
---------------------------------------
and my last commentary for the evening will be about the new words i learned during my mudfest weekend.
1. "egg". Someone who is white but acts asian (white in the outside, yellow on the inside)
2. "Banana" Someone who is asian but acts white (yellow on the outside, white on the inside)
and just for the record, it was an asian girl who told me this!
-------------------------------------------
I'm off to do an elementary school camp this week, but more importantly AFTER this camp I'm coming to Canada...woohooo. This girl needs some quality time with the following:
her parents
her sister
her Sari
her puppy
grass (the kind on my front lawn)
the car
a shopping mall (i can't believe i just said that, but it's true)

see you soon!